Friday, September 21, 2012

GORUCK what?


Why do I participate in the GORUCK challenge (GRC)? Because I like to challenge myself. I feel the need to increase my capacity for adversity. I need to be reminded that I'm not in control.  I need to remind myself that I'm more resilient  than I thought. What I didn't realize is that GORUCK would teach me about leadership, team work, and community.

First, a bit of context. I'm a pastor, and one who focuses on building community. You would think I'd have some of this nailed down, and I do, to an extent. I came to realize I needed more training.

I first signed up because ministry can be tectonic, and ambiguous at times because you're dealing with human nature (mine included) which seeks self preservation, and comfort.  This gets quickly exposed in the midst of suffering, which GORUCK has mastered. Given this condition, a pastor can sometimes wonder if he/she is making any impact or difference. So, we look to involve ourselves in things that are measurable, like building stuff, running, and gardening; anything that we can look back at and say," That got finished."

Are there physically easier ways to accomplish this sense of satisfaction? Absolutely. Take up model plane building, painting, or poetry.  Will you experience the same level of satisfaction upon completion . . . maybe. Will you learn about  intestinal fortitude and your ability to persevere through physical pain, mental torture, and a foreshortened sense of future ( Will this ever end?).  Probably not.

I have been an athlete the better part of my life. I received numerous honors and awards throughout High School. I have run five marathons, two 1/2 marathons ( one in the woods), and a plethora of 5Ks, with and without obstacles. I needed more. I wanted more. I got more, and then some.  The GRC was so far beyond my mental scope of ability. I had to try it. 10 to 12 hours, 15 to 20 miles, designed and facilitated by US Special Forces from nearly every branch whose goal was to physically tear us down and build us up as a team through various exercises and missions.  Who would pay to do this? I did. But not alone.

I immediately thought of Darrel Martin ( 8 years with the Marines) and Mark Kostek (Former Pitt Football Strength Coach and ultra marathoner). Both are nothing short of physical machines who smile and laugh through pain. They didn't even hesitate when I asked them to join me. I knew they would provide the kind of mutual accountability and encouragement that I would require. Plus, they're just fun to hang out with. We don't spend much time together outside of church, except when we train, but when we train we discuss a lot of topics and counsel each other through personal and work related issues. Rucking at 5AM in Brady's Run with headlamps provides a great opportunity to leave stuff on the trail. Our training together confirmed my instincts; I chose the right guys for the job. It was I who was concerned about being the weak link, but I knew I could control two things, my attitude and my effort.

While I wouldn't say the GRC was easier than our training, our training provided us with the ability to enjoy the GRC, and not simply endure it. I have endured races, and it ain't no fun. I have trained  with less motivated partners, and the song " He ain't heavy, He's my brother" didn't apply. Trying to accomplish the unthinkable with people less prepared, and less motivated will only result in resentment when carrying a log for two and half hours. Darrel and Mark were great training partners and team mates. Hugh Harper, who joined me for my second one, proved to be the same. They made all the difference. And a shout out to Mark Czartoryski who trained with us. I'm going to get you out there someday Mark!

What did we actually do? If you have ever watched "Surviving the Cut" or "Two Weeks In Hell" then you get a glimpse.  The GRC is more like a prolonged peek at Special Forces training. The pain and  suffering has a purpose. It's to expose weaknesses, both mentally and physically, but the mental comes  first. Self doubt, frustration, entitlement, and resentment are the ingredients for a cocktail of failure. Allow any one of these to dwell in your mind for too long and you're done. Allow several of them to take root and you become like a millstone wrapped around the neck of your team and yourself.

If you can keep the concept of team in front of you then you have a chance for completion. The experience of physical exhaustion forced us to work as a team. If you weren't tired you began to believe that you could do it alone. Not only does that hinder the team, but it jeopardizes the chances of achieving the mission. Michael Jordan couldn't win 6 titles on his own. He needed a supporting cast. Why would I think it's any different for me?

I signed up for the GRC because I had something to prove to myself physically, and I needed a goal that I could measure. The GRC provided that. I also taught me about myself, community, team work, and leadership.

1. Community - People who I had never met before became friends the moment we suffered together. Our mission was to get the team to complete the mission, not run a personal race of pride. The mission created the community. The suffering cemented it. True community is purified in the midst of trial, therefore I rejoice in suffering.

2. Team Work - A team can accomplish the unthinkable if everyone is headed in the same direction. I can't imagine carrying a 12 foot log from East Carson to Mount Washington in Pitt, but I can visualize our team doing it, and we did. A team is greater then a collection of individuals seeking personal gratification. This requires each team member to sacrifice personal agendas , embrace adversity, and agree to a common purpose and goal.

3. Leadership - It's not for everyone. We are all Walter Mittys, but it's one thing to think of yourself as a leader and another  to exercise leadership. I have looked upon men and women whom I thought would have decent leadership skills only to see them buckle because of fear. I have shirked away from leadership because I didn't want to be responsible for other's pain. I have experienced frustration because simple tasks were lead by consensus.  Leadership isn't necessarily genetic, but it does require skill: clear communication of expectations,  a willingness to take the blame, and a desire to see other team members celebrated.

I also learned that if possible, pick your team members carefully. Bill Hybel's three C's ( Character, Competency, and Chemistry) of leadership are the necessities for building a good team. If a perspective team member lacks anyone one of these it will only serve to make working together harder if you bring them on. Don't fill a spot out of desperation, and pray it works out.  I knew that Darrel, Mark, and Hugh met these in spades, and we were all able to enjoy success together.

4. Myself - Far too often I have found myself being the stumbling block to my teams success. Far too often I have had the right instinct but feared not being liked, or didn't know what the next step should  be and feared looking incompetent. Either way, it was fear, and the team suffered for it.

The GRC is a great metaphor for life, only you experience its truth in a shorter and more intense fashion. I gravitate towards comfort. Comfort and progress are not usually found in bed together. While I desire progress, I have found that I crave comfort and security. The GRC is a great tool to exercise those demons because you have no idea what to expect, and only a general idea when it will be over. What you can control is your attitude and effort.  You quickly learn not to set your sites on the future, but only in accomplishing the task ahead of you.



Is the GRC for everyone? I wish it was, but I know its not. To quote Todd Rundgren, " If there was a short cut I'da found it, but there's no easy way around it." I learn truth best when accompanied by suffering. Hebrews 5:8 tells us that " Even though he (Jesus) was a son, he learned obedience through suffering." I guess I don't get a pass on that one either. The GRC has been an incubator of truth, matured through pain. It has provided me with a greater understanding of team work, and the power of community. While the GRC is not church, it has lessons to teach us about being church to one another.

So whats next? I'm prayerfully considering their challenge called Selection.  I have no illusions that it will just be a prolonged Goruck. I know it has more to offer and demand. Comfort or Progress?